Life is not an excuse for living...

No, I'm not emo. Though, that praise did pop into my head today while I was on the bus, on the way to school.

I've been feeling that I've been slacking off and is apparent in my work. My 3D modeling scene is hardly anything I would admit of being proud of, however I'm going to set aside some time to revamp every thing and hopefully be more satisfy with my work. After all my work is my life and my life is my work, or something like that. I do treat everything I create as if it were my own child, that also means that they get treated pretty bastardly if I dislike it. *sigh* I think I placed too much on my platter at the moment, though I feel like dropping the part of my social self and become a reclusive workaholic (welcome back high school), though, I find myself only to be happier with myself when someone knows more about me, a bit conceited I know.

I really don't know what else to write about, but I guess this is some way of jotting down thoughts of stuff that I find really irritating to find rebounding in my head.

I feel strange that I do leave a good impression with others, that I am able to make someone's day with my presence around. I never knew I was such a person, and I always see myself as someone that has troubles expressing myself. Though, it was nice to see a friend today asking when am I going to graduate, and my presence will be missed, haha. I find it strange and reassuring.

Speaking of graduation, the thought of grad school has been popping up here and there, and I don't know how I should digest these thoughts. I told myself I'll give myself a one year grace period before doing anything, I still feel I haven't mature as an individual at all and I see grad school as this super adult life style. Hopefully, as time goes by I can put these thoughts together. Where would I go to grad school? Freshmen year I thought to myself, maybe SCAD, but as time went on I've grown attached to UIC, I don't know what's so special about it, but I feel like I'm a person that's easily grown attached to things. Though is a good trait, I think it also gives everything I have an emotional weight and that could be a good or bad thing.

-David M.